Meta

China Orders Meta to Return AI Startup; Meta Asks If It Can At Least Keep the Mug

BEIJING / MENLO PARK — China’s government has ordered Meta to unwind its $2 billion acquisition of AI startup Manus, ruling that the deal represents an unacceptable transfer of frontier technology and escalating what analysts are calling “the AI version of a trade war” and what both governments are calling “a regulatory matter” while clearly meaning the same thing.

The ruling, issued by China’s Ministry of Commerce, requires Meta to fully divest its stake in Manus — a Shanghai-founded AI company known for its autonomous “agentic” capabilities — within ninety days. Failure to comply will result in penalties that the ministry described as “significant” and that Meta’s legal team described as “something we are reviewing.”

Meta Unveils AI Version of Mark Zuckerberg; Employees Report It Is Warmer, Makes Eye Contact

MENLO PARK, CA — Meta announced Thursday that it has developed an artificial intelligence model trained on CEO Mark Zuckerberg’s mannerisms, communication style, and company strategy, designed to interact with employees when he is unavailable.

The announcement was received with cautious optimism by staff, followed by the unsettling realisation that no one was entirely sure which version they had been talking to at last Tuesday’s all-hands.

“He asked me how my weekend was,” said one product manager, who requested anonymity. “The real Mark has never asked me how my weekend was. I went home and cried a little, but in a good way.”